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OH EM GEE: Halloween in Advance Edition

Good lord, it's almost Halloween!

OK, no, not really. But it is the day of the first press release from Portland's Pumpkin Patch, home of the five-acre MAiZE. Yes, spelled like that. It's a little silly, but the actual maze is nothing of the sort. At least if you go during the last three weekends in October, when it's haunted. Some friends and I headed out to the maze a couple of years ago and found ourselves giggling hysterically for a good couple of hours while covered in mud (flip-flops are a no-no; I wound up barefoot, my feet getting an accidental mud bath). We got lost, we chatted up monsters, we got the crap scared out of us a couple of times, and we accidentally almost got a monster in trouble (we thought he had a flask). Remember, kids, the maze is as interactive as you make it. Engage the monsters in conversation! Especially the lonely ones near the end. They just aren't appreciated enough.

Oh, yeah: There's also a 30-foot hay pyramid. What?