By Slugvannah Brown
Eugene newcomer Panda Bennett, aka Panda SnuggleSlug, aka professional cuddler/tarot reader extraordinaire, was crowned the 2024 “raining queen” in the 42nd annual SLUG Queen Competition and Coronation. “I feel so grateful, overwhelmed and shocked,” she said of receiving the crown.
The queen of the Society for the Legitimization of the Ubiquitous Gastropod has been deemed “the Unofficial Goodwill Ambassador of Eugene” since 1983. The SLUG queen is elected in a glamorous annual pageant with a slugsona (slug name and costume) who participates in a talent showcase and in clever answers to a question from an old queen (who is also one of the judges who have been properly bribed beforehand).
Like all SLUG queens before her, Panda SnuggleSlug is expected (though it is optional) to slither around Eugene throughout her one year “rain,” appearing at events, working with nonprofits, and doing whatever she can to spread the slime of goodwill across the city.
“She has a lovely presence. And I think the fact that she is so focused on community, and sharing her knowledge and her wisdom,” says Melva Boles aka Sustainably Old Queen Melva.
“My heart is so happy to see all of you. I know with my whole being that we can do beautiful things,” SnuggleSlug said in her inauguration speech.
Sitara T. Slugshine is the runner up — someone who is expected to take on the duties if the queen is not able, “so that we are not queenless, which we do not want,” said Forgetfully Old Slug Queen Bananita Sluginsky (Sarah Ulerick).
SnuggleSlug’s rain was preceded by Jilynn Cherish aka Jubilee Hedonisto, last year’s raining queen. “I think she’ll have a lovely time,” Hedonisto says. “She was a fabulous candidate from the start.” Unlike regular royalty, the SLUG crown is not “inherited” — “once a queen, always a queen, and you never lose your crown once your rain is through, you just become an “old queen,” campaigning for goodwill, and helping to elect the next one.
Hedonisto plans to “keep on sliming, keep on shining,” she said.
The pageant was judged by 26 old queens, and celebrity guests including Angela Ocana, Eugene Library services director, and SparKelle, “the real live tooth fairy” from Newport.
The pageant kicked off with 30 minutes of music from the One More Time Marching Band playing hits like Stevie Wonder’s “Isn’t She Lovely” and Ben E. King’s “Stand By Me.” However, their highlight was offering occasional transitional interludes of the Bob the Builder theme song, or playing the Jeopardy theme song when they felt emcee Sluginksy was talking for too long.
When Sluginski took the stage, she asked the audience if they knew the pageant rules, to which the audience shouted, “The rules are there are no rules!” and then the event began.
The pageant took a moment to honor the six “queens of lore” who have passed away, including the 2005 SLUG queen, musician Shandi Sinnamon, aka Frank Slugsnotra, who died on July 4. Sinnamon is best known outside of Eugene for her song “He’s a Dream” that played in the famous water splashing on stage scene in the hit 1983 movie Flashdance.
SLUG queen competitors highlighted talents from felting a stone paperweight (Incontinentia PlasterSlug aka Joi Cardinal) to dressing as corn and dancing to the viral TikTok “It’s Corn” song (Joanie Kent aka Sitara T. Slugshine the Agriculture Slug).
The highlight of the talent portion was SnuggleSlug’s “arts and crafts” talent — bringing out her very own creations: her two sons and daughter. “The younger ones are masters of chaos and I think the older one bites” she announced. But she said she was proud of her work regardless.
Her “creations” passed affirmation cards around the audience, while SnuggleSlug talked for the three minutes about how as a professional cuddler, she is here to “hold a space for people,” and wants everyone to know that, regardless of all of the negativity, it is always important to practice “radical self love, even when life isn’t all slime and sparkles.”
No, half the audience wasn’t crying. They just had slime in their eyes.
In the question portion, the wannabe queens each chose an old queen to ask them an interview question. When Hedonisto asked SnuggleSlug how she would embrace her inner cicada and make a grand entrance — but in a slugly fashion — SnuggleSlug responded that she plans to “embrace the slow,” and take time to appreciate those quiet, peaceful moments amid the chaos.
This year, Queen Melva, crowned the second ever SLUG queen in1984, received her 40-year pin, and has become a “sustainably old queen.” She is so-titled because when a queen ends her rain, she gets pinned as an old queen. After an old queen has been around for 10 years, they get honored in a pinning ceremony that promotes them to “very old queen.” After 20, they become a “very, very old queen” and after 30, they get to replace the “verys” and choose their own adjective.
“It was a very sweet program tonight. Very loving,” Sluginsky said of this year’s pageant. She observed that it was more “low key” than the typical grandiosity that aligns with the event’s reputation, but she noted that this year’s candidates showed that less can certainly be more. “Everybody had a very kind message of community, and everybody stood up for their platforms. It was very beautiful.”
Check out the Eugene SLUG queens at SLUGQueen.com.