Can’t Eat Memories

There has been a serious miscarriage of culinary justice, a foodie folly recklessly perpetrated by none other than the once-respected Eugene Weekly.

For how could any self-respecting food editor with a functioning tongue in the fine city of Eugene not nominate Tradewinds@Jiffy for the following categories: Best Meal Under $8; Best Comfort Food; Best Burger; Best New Restaurant; and, finally, the inexcusably nonexistent Best Fucking Kebab category?

You would sooner nominate the “memory” of Papa’s Soul Food for Best BBQ, and yet you somehow make no mention of the pillow-y, moist miracle that is the Jiffy falafel, a delectable treat that puts the bonzo in garbonzo? For shame!

As a newcomer to this town, I made it a point to try every restaurant with a halfway decent Yelp review. I’m simply flabbergasted you haven’t recognized Jiffy. I once lived abroad and subsisted solely on döner kebabs/gyros/shawarma, and Jiffy tops them all. And it’s right here in Eugene. And you’re missing it. 

If, by chance, you do suffer from an exotic tastebud deficiency, I apologize for my tack and mean no insult. I would simply recommend you employ writers who have a working sense of taste before they are allowed to nominate restaurants for Best of Eugene. You’ll thank me later. 

Jonathan Miller


Editor’s note: EW’s Best of Eugene is reader-nominated and reader-voted. And each year we ask our readers to suggest future categories. So alas, you have only yourself to blame.

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