Monster Tools

It was Friday, Feb. 21, and living next to the Eugene fair grounds, I knew the Oregon Logging Conference was in town because of the massive, pristine, lifted, monster truck with the chrome polished brush guard parked out in front of my house. It was a Ford F-350 Cummins, off-road, 4X4, Lariat, power stroke diesel with fully tinted windows.

What an impressive machine! I remember needing to sit down as I gazed upon this engine on wheels. The only thing larger than the Ford logo was the custom exhaust pipe that was the diameter of a dinner plate, it must be a special person that drives this marvel of the modern world — and what a contribution to society.

But then I thought: Oh wait, this might be the neighbor’s new truck because surely a pristine princess like this could not be used for logging. There would be scratches and scrapes from driving on the logging roads and mud and grit all over it?

Then I went down 13th Avenue and saw that there was an entire fleet of perfectly manicured monster trucks parked in the fairgrounds overflowing into the neighborhoods.

Then it dawned on me, these flawless trucks are used to carry tools. They need to be so massive because these lumberjacks carry axes and chainsaws. They can put their tools in the beds or in the chrome toolboxes. As I thought about it, there is even ample space for tools on the seats in the cab of these trucks.

Joshua Wrolstad