BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO
Dear Mexican: What is an anchor baby? I am a 45-year-old male born in the U.S. My mother was born in ex-Yugoslavia (now Serbia), and my father was also born in ex-Yugoslavia (now Croatia). My father arrived to this country via a green card about four years before I was born, and my mother arrived 16 months before I was born after being petitioned to enter the U.S. by my father. I was the very first person in my entire family on both my mother’s and father’s side to be born in the U.S. When I was born, my father told my mother that now they will never be deported because they have an American-born son. Many years later, both of my parents became citizens. Today, I wonder: WAS I an anchor baby? I speak good English, Spanish and some limited Serbian. I don’t look Hispanic, but what do I tell my Hispanic friends?
— Spanish-Speaking Serbian-American Living in Houston
Dear Yugo: A so-called anchor baby is an American citizen — says so in the U.S. Constitution. In popular parlance, it’s a term used by Know Nothings to deride the children of immigrants whom relatives can use to sponsor visas and other government goodies. Though the Know Nothings would love to have you believe only illegal Mexicans are capable of anchor babies, cases like yours have been occurring since the days of Virginia Dare. Not only that, but the etymological roots of “anchor baby” suggests legal or illegal status doesn’t matter; a 1987 Los Angeles Times Magazine (RIP) article examining the burden of young Vietnamese refugees trying to earn enough money to get their family out of refugee camps referred to them as “anchor children.”
“Anchor baby,” on the other mano, is a slur of a recent provenance — the earliest mainstream media reference the Mexican found was a January 7, 1997 Providence Journal-Bulletin story that quoted Federation for American Immigration Reform (FAIR) president Dan Stein as saying public benefits “encourages immigrant families to conceive ‘anchor babies’ so they can remain in this country and collect benefits.” Stein — whose organization is listed as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center — can’t claim the creator’s mantle for the term, however: The excellent etymology website doubletongued.org lists a 1996 Usenet posting as the term’s earliest recorded date, and I’m sure dinosaurs like the California Coalition for Immigration Reform and other pioneer anti-immigrant pendejos bandied it around before. As to how all this relates to you: You weren’t an anchor baby. Your parents were already here legally, and your citizenship can’t stop your parents from a trip with la migra. Hope this clears up things, and make sure to boil the Houston water before you drink it!
I have read your book and religiously followed your stuff online. But I still am not informed enough about the sex lives of Mexican men. I fell in love with a man in Mexico, and I’m trying to find him again but I have a few questions. First of all, what is the average penis size of a Mexican man? I know that women are supposed to remain virgins until marriage — is this the same with men? Do they sleep around a lot if they don’t have to be virgins? Also, are Mexican men good in bed?
— The Suzanne that Fell Hard for Reno
Dear Gabacha: Penis-size surveys are like Guatemalans — there are a bunch of them, but few are reputable. Using my own wang and life as an example, I’ll say that the average Mexican man packs John Holmes in his pants, has no expectations of virginity before marriage before him but expects his conquests to have only seen a penis in a World Book Encyclopedia entry, beds 10 mujeres a night and is such an extraordinary lover that he could make a chick orgasm by uncapping his bottle of Tapatío.
Get all your Mexican fun at myspace.com/ocwab, youtube.com/askamexicano, or send your questions to themexican@askamexican.net!
A Note From the Publisher
Dear Readers,
The last two years have been some of the hardest in Eugene Weekly’s 43 years. There were moments when keeping the paper alive felt uncertain. And yet, here we are — still publishing, still investigating, still showing up every week.
That’s because of you!
Not just because of financial support (though that matters enormously), but because of the emails, notes, conversations, encouragement and ideas you shared along the way. You reminded us why this paper exists and who it’s for.
Listening to readers has always been at the heart of Eugene Weekly. This year, that meant launching our popular weekly Activist Alert column, after many of you told us there was no single, reliable place to find information about rallies, meetings and ways to get involved. You asked. We responded.
We’ve also continued to deepen the coverage that sets Eugene Weekly apart, including our in-depth reporting on local real estate development through Bricks & Mortar — digging into what’s being built, who’s behind it and how those decisions shape our community.
And, of course, we’ve continued to bring you the stories and features many of you depend on: investigations and local government reporting, arts and culture coverage, sudoku and crossword puzzles, Savage Love, and our extensive community events calendar. We feature award-winning stories by University of Oregon student reporters getting real world journalism experience. All free. In print and online.
None of this happens by accident. It happens because readers step up and say: this matters.
As we head into a new year, please consider supporting Eugene Weekly if you’re able. Every dollar helps keep us digging, questioning, celebrating — and yes, occasionally annoying exactly the right people. We consider that a public service.
Thank you for standing with us!
Publisher
Eugene Weekly
P.S. If you’d like to talk about supporting EW, I’d love to hear from you!
jody@eugeneweekly.com
(541) 484-0519